I’m approaching mid life in about 10 or so years (I’m 52 so that should give me a pretty good run) and I’ve started thinking about what kind of vehicle I need to get to satisfy my mid-life hunger pangs. The red Ferrari is the cliche….the little red Miata is kind of fey…so what’s a transplant wannabe mountain kind of guy to do?  Get a camouflaged Monster Truck, that’s what.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to command any respect in my golden years…but I think that when I pull up behind you in my 7 mpg hide in the woods mobile, welllll….people sit up and hunker down in their car seats and take notice that Big Daddy has arrived!

That I’m thinking at all about what kind of vehicle will command respect is probably a pretty good sign that I’m going to need something to compensate…but why not start early and get a jump on it all?  They probably check to see if the future owner has ever used a phrase like “command respect” before they let you register a camo truck, though…weed out the posers.  Wish me luck if you don’t see me  (I’ll be camouflaged, you understand?)