Any parent worth his or her salt is going to say that they’d do anything for their children.

“Why, I’d go to the ends of the earth, I’d jump into the fire, I’d give my heart if they needed a transplant…I’d do anything for my kids…”

When crotchety daddy gets a call from his little girl from a school that’s 20 minutes of moderate paced driving away….and she says, “Dad…the car won’t start again”…that theoretical devotion is put to the test.

Now, of course my going to help her was never in doubt.  I’d help her with anything that I could….fix whatever problem she asked me to, and probably try to fix some problems that she wished I would keep my nose out of…but, darn it, I was so relaxed at the end of my day.  I was so ready to just sit after driving around….sitting?…for most of my work day.

“Did you hit it with the hammer? Did you hit it in the place I showed you to hit it? Try hitting it again.”

“I tried that already”, she said.

“Try it again.”  I really didn’t want to drive down to the school to hit the old truck with a hammer myself.

I could hear her outside of the truck…tap, tap, tap.

“Still won’t start.”

I wanted to tell her to really whack it…it should make more of a pound, pound, whack sound than a tap, tap, tap sound…but what I said was…

“Hold on, I’m coming”

I felt like a cranky Liam Neeson in that movie where he goes to Paris to save his daughter with the specialized skills he’d gathered over a lifetime of espionage activities.

I was really going to lay into that truck with the hammer when I got there.

I have skills, too.

Actually, “tap,tap,tap” is the more appropriate way to handle the situation…it’s only a solenoid so the big whack is both impossible in a crowded engine compartment and unnecessary.  It’s just that it makes you feel like getting an even bigger hammer when the car won’t start.  It makes you feel like wailing on it…no matter how inappropriate.

My daughter was talking to her mother on the phone while I was making the drive to the school…she said that I’d probably tap it a couple of times when I got there and it would start, and sure enough…that’s what happened.  Thank goodness.  It would be a shame to call AAA…or even AA…and watch some guy look at it and then say that he needed to “tow it in for diagnostics”.

“Here’s the hammer,” I’d say.  “Try that first”.

You don’t see many really cranky heroes in the movies.

Most of the time, they’re chomping at the bit to wade into battle…”I’ll save you, Ma’am…don’t worry…I’ll save you.”  They don’t say, “hit it again…harder…try harder”.  They are steady and strong and everything a hero should be.

I’m cranky.

Most of the time I keep it under wraps…kind of “covert cranky”…but I can be a cranky little baby when I’m backed into a corner by a cheap Chinese aftermarket starter.

I wish my family didn’t already know that…but I doubt it’s a grand revelation to them to hear that Daddy can be a cranky guy sometimes.

But, you know, in my defense…I will jump into the fire for my family, I will drive to the ends of the earth, I will slay the dragon and fight the good fight.  If they ever need me, I will be there for them.

Every ounce of cranky, moaning and groaning, bitchy me will be there for them.

Yay for them….

“Isn’t there anyone else we can call first ?”

image from here