Jennerizing

bruce jenner wheaties

Jenny was teasing me the other day.

That is a rare occurrence…I don’t know what got into her that morning.

She felt my cheek right after I shaved and said, “Your beard is getting kind of sparse or something…it doesn’t seem to grow as fast as it used to.”

I thought about it for a minute…and told her that I was “Jennerizing”.

And we laughed….and laughed…………………………….and laughed.

Actually, we might have chuckled… if I was lucky.

I’m not as funny as I think I am most of the time.

But it was kind of funny…”funny/funny”… and “funny/strange”.

Of course, I was referring to Bruce Jenner’s ongoing transformation.

I don’t believe that a trachea shave to make his adam’s apple less prominent is a move towards being a woman.

It would take a lot more than pretty fingernails and longer hair and the absence of an adam’s apple to turn into a woman.

There’s more going on than just those surface things in a bid towards feminization.

There’s more to a lady than just the absence of an adam’s apple.

But you sure can turn yourself into a freaky dude if you don’t know when to stop.

Why not just wear some silky underwear and call it a day?

It would save you a lot of money.

I remember watching Bruce Jenner in the Olympics.

He was pretty freaking great. He could do it all….run, jump, throw…whatever they made him do, he did it well.

That was really impressive.

So what’s up with all the womanizing?

I don’t mean it in the sense of being a real lothario…chasing after all the ladies now that he’s freed up from that Kardashian woman.

I mean “womanizing”… like he’s turning into a lady.

What the heck is up with that?

bruce jenner ladyShoot…can’t find any good pictures of the “lady transformation”. He doesn’t even look like a lady in this picture.

He just looks like as older dude who needs a new sports car.

What business is it of mine, anyway, now that I think about it?

But if I watch enough television….and don’t practice good judgement about the channels I watch…some snarky little weirdo is going to keep me up to date on all the news that I don’t really need to know.

News like whether or not Bruce Jenner is turning into a lady.

We’re going to get pounded by a snowstorm and I’m talking about Bruce Jenner’s new lady parts…the hair, the fingernails, the trachea.  There’s something not right about talking about stuff like that when the weather is a more pressing issue.

But….Hammering Hank’s record is beaten by some steroid freaks and Bruce Jenner is turning into a lady (according to the “news” media).

I don’t know if I can trust these sports guys anymore.

Speaking of trust, how about the very successful football player who came out as being gay…and all the backlash he’s getting?

I hear stuff like he possibly won’t get any offers from a professional team because of his homosexuality.

Well….I suppose that it might make things awkward in the locker room occasionally…but maybe his honesty should be applauded?

There’s so many liars in sports…look at Lance.  Maybe a guy who tells the truth, no matter how potentially damaging that truth is…in the context of the world of sports, should be celebrated?

I don’t really know.

This Bruce Jenner thing has got me flummoxed, though.

What did that Kardashian lady do to him?


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