What was it like to be Barry White?

You know, when I “wiki’d” him, I found out that he’s one of the world’s bestselling artists of all time….that he sold in excess of 100 million albums…that he had 20 gold and 10 platinum singles.

WOW.

I did not know that.

And he sang songs like this….

“Can’t Get Enough of Your Love” Barry White

I think that Barry White was a very lonely man.

If only he’d been able to find love.

Nah…..I’M KIDDING!!!

CHICKS DIG BARRY WHITE!!!

What was that like for him….doing something simple like going to the grocery store….asking the checkout lady, “Oh, darling….could you please put my eggs on top? Yeah, baby….that’s the way….don’t you ever stop….”

What was that like for Barry White?

Of course, I never heard his speaking voice.

He might have had a real high-pitched speaking voice….really nasal and whiny.

I don’t know.

That thought completely humanizes him and negates his potency.

That guy was superhuman with that deep, seductive singing voice….and then I have to go and sully his image with the conjecture that maybe he wasn’t as seductive all the time as we’d like to think.

Maybe when he went to the grocery store, he’d squeal out in a horribly whiny sing-song voice, “MY EGGS!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!! DON’T YOU KNOW THAT THE EGGS NEVER GO ON THE BOTTOM?!! MY EGGS!! MY EGGS!!! MY EGGS!!!!”

Man…that thought is sure a mood buster.

I shouldn’t do that to Barry White.

It’s that Spiderman thing all over….”with great power comes great responsibility” ….you know the one….you know that line from the movie.

I imagine that Barry White only used his power for good.

He was good to the ladies….and the ladies were good to Barry White.

Check out this song….

“I’m Gonna Love You Just a Little More Babe” Barry White

oh.

Oh, Barry White! I am so sorry that I listened to that!

It sounded kind of…private.

That’s the thing about Barry White….he took us right into his world of seduction….and for about 4 or five minutes, let us stay there….until the next time we heard him on the radio.

He’s like a comet that only comes around every so often, though.

I couldn’t pull off that Barry White routine.

Jenny would laugh at me if I came at her with a deep “Ohhhhhhhh, baby….”.

I couldn’t pull it off.

I guess that’s what makes Barry White….”Barry White”.

I wonder how old he was when he figured out what he was going to do?

Did he go to his Momma and say, in his preternaturally deep child’s voice, “Momma….ohhhh, baby….you know, every time I think of this, it makes me think I’m gonna be, someone who loves and loves and loves, what else can I be?”

“Momma? Momma!! Did you hear me? Did you hear what I just moaned?”

It’s a different kind of career choice….to be one of the great seducers.

So….I’ll ask again because I’ll never know the answer:

What was it like to be Barry White?