It hit me this morning that if all you do is wax semi-eloquently about how important it is to “notice” what’s happening as your children grow up, you are probably missing most of it.
Of course, I’m “in it”.
We are a unit and I am the HUB, man.
I’m the hub…..I’m in it… full on.
(That’s the ego talking, of course. I know who the “hub” is when Sparrow yells for “Mommy”.)
I think that if you talk about something a lot, then people think that you really feel deeply about the subject.
Spirituality….civic pride….the fairness of the monetary system….or, maybe, even family…..the more you talk about it, the more committed to the idea you seem.
What’s that called? “Lip service”?
You live your life, you take care of your family, and you let them know that they are loved….without question or condition…..they are loved.
What could be confusing or hard about that?
In our situation….in our family….we have a pretty big spread between the first two children and these little guys.
Because of that spread, I can speak from some sort of experience when I talk about “paying attention” or missing a moment.
The children grow up fast.
The thing about paying close attention when the children are little (or big, actually…..I should pay close attention to everyone in my family) is that, whether or not I notice everything doesn’t necessarily mean that I remember everything.
I guess that’s OK, though.
You remember what you can.
Maybe that’s why there’s two parents in most cases….so that the other can fill in the memory holes.
You can write about everything and paint a picture of patience and understanding….but it’s only the day in and day out “real behavior” that makes things any good.
All we have are our actions in the end.
All these words may as well be clouds evaporating in the heat of a long summer day.
It’s just the actions that really matter.
I heard this song the other day and really like it….by Canadian singer/songwriter Chris Luedecke, who records under the name “Old Man Luedecke”. It says what I’m waxing around pretty clearly….
“the early days” Old Man Luedecke