all this time…

astral clock

I read that people have stopped wearing wristwatches.

They use their phone now if they want to tell what time it is.

I wear a wristwatch.

Even though my Tracfone would tell me the time, I don’t carry it with me….so I still wear a watch.

This morning, I woke up at 5:01.

At 5:02, I realized that the cat had been in all night….hiding somewhere in the house.

I fed the cat on the porch at 5:03.

At 5:05, I put the water on to boil in the electric kettle.

I found and took my vitamins by 5:08….and by 5:18, I was walking up the stairs with my french press full of coffee, ready to write a few words and to continue getting ready for my day….and preparing to enjoy my pending caffeination.

I remember looking at the clock when I went up the stairs, and it said, “5:18”.

I felt late….like something had been taken from me…..a moment I missed or could have used to be busy at something else.

The sun comes up, the sun goes down.

That’s a pretty gentle indication of what happens to a day.

But….these digital shifts…the minutes and seconds….atomically synced….that’s kind of a harsh reminder of what I’m not getting done.

That’s not as gentle as a new sunrise….or the sight of the sliver of a quarter moon across a grassy field.

It’s 5:35 now….5:36 now….electonically perfect….accurate.

I stress over “being on time”.

I think that it’s some kind of courtesy for people to be able to check their watches or phones, and in the exact moment that I promised, I appear.

I appear….on time.

I guess that’s a good thing.

It’s 5:40 now. (I checked the email)

You know, though….time is just another of our weird inventions…really.

We figure out a new way to track it….with a synced GPS….with something “atomic”……and we think that we have a chance to corral it….to keep it manageable….managed.

Managed.

Hah.

“Awareness” doesn’t mean “understanding”.

People say that time is money.

That’s probably true.

Time is just like money….a ghost….another construct….just a thing that we made up.

It’s a thing that we fool ourselves into thinking we can control because we know how to measure it very accurately.

The sun and the moon….the seasons…..that’s the time we should be paying attention to….but we worry about the time we can bottle up….5:44, now….and say, “yes….I do know what time it is….it’s 5:45 now…..you’re welcome:”

Of couse, having said that, I’ll worry about getting Nate to school on time….and then getting to work….on time…..and then finishing my job in the time they’ve given me to do it.

I will worry about time.

I will spend a good chunk of my time worrying.

About time.

That’s nuts.

How would I spend my day if I couldn’t flip a switch and make it seem like the sun was still shining….even though the moon had been out for hours?

(It’s 5:49 now, and Nate is up. That’s why I hurry….this quiet time is elusive and disappears rapidly. Nate is up.)

Just once, I’d like to be late for something because I couldn’t stop watching a new sunrise….and wasn’t wearing a watch.

I may as well be wearing one of the collars they put on dogs to keep them in the yard.

That watch keeps me from bumping up against an invisible fence!

Freaking time.

About Peter Rorvig

I'm a non-practicing artist, a mailman, a husband, a father...not listed in order of importance. I believe that things can always get better....and that things are usually better than we think.

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